You Are Not Powerless

I think it’s sad that people who go to AA are told they are powerless over alcohol.

I understand what the phrase means in their program, that alcohol has a hold on you, that you can’t control it once it’s in your system, but when you’re in the fight to quit, that word powerless just doesn’t sit right with me. Because I see it differently.

If you are getting up every day and deciding, second by second, that you are going to live without alcohol you are anything but powerless. That’s raw, real power. That’s a strength most people will never even have to tap into.

I’m now about two months alcohol-free. My reasons for quitting are different than yours might be, and maybe different from those who sit in AA meetings. I didn’t come here because I lost everything, or because someone gave me an ultimatum, or because I woke up one day in a place I didn’t remember.

I came here because I realized alcohol was inflaming my body, messing with my hormones, killing my sleep, and dulling my joy. I didn’t need to hit rock bottom. I just needed to ask myself one honest question

Does alcohol make me feel better or worse?

Not How much do I drink?

Not Do I “have a problem”?

Not Do I drink more than the people around me?

Just…..Does this substance improve my life or damage it?

And when I was really honest with myself, the answer was obvious. It was making everything worse, my energy, my patience, my health, my self-esteem, my ability to show up for my family.

So I stopped.

And here’s the thing…whether you walk into an AA meeting, sign up for a sobriety course, tell a friend you’re done drinking, or quietly make the decision alone, that choice is pure power.

You are not powerless over alcohol. You are powerful in spite of it. You are proving, second by second, that you have the ability to choose differently, even when your body and brain are screaming for the opposite.

So if no one has told you lately, let me say it:

You’re not weak.

You’re not powerless.

You’re not broken.

You are strong. You are capable. You are the proof that a different life is possible whether or not you ever hit rock bottom.

-Casey