Can I Still Call Myself Sober If I Use THC?

When I first stopped drinking, I felt like I was breaking up with the one thing I thought helped me manage everything—stress, anxiety, overstimulation, anger, exhaustion, even joy. Wine was my reward, my escape hatch, my identity in some weird, twisted mommy culture kind of way. So when I finally said, “I don’t drink anymore,” I clung hard to that word: sober.

But then came the question that even I wasn’t sure how to answer:

Can I still call myself sober if I use THC/CBD/any other mood enhancing/altering substances….

Let me just say it out loud: Yes. I do use THC sometimes. My alternative medicine/hormone doctor actually encouraged it, especially as I’m navigating perimenopause, high cortisol, sleep issues, and the hormonal chaos that no one warned us would hit like a semi-truck at age 42. And it’s been a helpful tool for inflammation, anxiety, rest, and overall mood regulation.

But does it “count” as sober?

Here’s where things get complicated… and interesting.

Sobriety Isn’t One-Size-Fits-All

If you go by old-school 12-step rules not for me, but I deeply respect the communities who find healing there), then no, THC use is considered a relapse. Total abstinence is the only acceptable definition of sobriety in those circles. And if that’s your lane? I support you.

But there’s another path emerging. One that acknowledges the why behind our choices. One that asks, “Is this helping or hurting me?” rather than slapping a label on our healing and calling it done.

I Don’t Drink Alcohol. I’m Sober From That.

Alcohol was destroying my sleep, wrecking my nervous system, inflaming my body, stealing my energy, numbing my emotions, and making me feel less present in the life I fought so hard to build. It was toxic, for me.

So no, I don’t drink. And yes, I still call myself sober, because I am free from the substance that was causing me harm.

The Truth About Mommy Wine Culture

Let’s be real—moms are being sold poison in a pretty pink glass. We are told to drink away our overwhelm. But it’s not working. It’s hurting us, it’s aging us, and it’s making it harder to actually cope with the chaos of motherhood.

Swapping a nightly wine ritual for a low-dose THC gummy or a CBD drink isn’t a tradeoff, it’s a transformation. I still light a candle. I still hold a glass in my hand. But now, I wake up rested. I don’t feel ashamed. My kids don’t see glassy eyes and quick tempers. They see me.

And I like who I’m becoming.

Here’s what I know now

Sobriety isn’t about perfection—it’s about presence. Healing looks different for everyone. If a substance isn’t harming you or your relationships, and is used with intention and care, it doesn’t cancel out the progress you’ve made. I don’t owe anyone an explanation for what I’ve chosen to let go of or what I’ve chosen to embrace.

So, Can You Still Call Yourself Sober If You Use THC?

If you’ve stopped using a substance that was harming you…

If you’re showing up for your life with honesty and clarity…

If you’re healing your mind, body, and spirit with intention…

Then yes. You are sober. And more importantly you are free.

If this resonates with you, you’re not alone. There are so many of us waking up from the wine fog, questioning what we’ve been told, and rebuilding something real. You’re allowed to define what recovery looks like for you.

Drop a comment. Share your story. Or just sit with this truth….

You don’t have to be perfect to be free.

-Casey